Have you ever been told, “Don’t ask me, because you may not like what the answer is?” Someone to whom I am very close is known for sometimes brutal honesty. Friends will ask for his opinion and receive, many times, more than what they had asked. At times, he will ask them beforehand if they truly want to hear his answer. Most of the time, they will say yes, and brace themselves for what they are about to hear. It is amazing and indeed admirable to see these people listen to what he has to say and sometimes allow it to challenge them, perhaps even in ways that they have not been challenged before. Food for thought does not always come to us in nicely wrapped presents. Wisdom can seem quite harsh and even unfair, but that does not detract from its authenticity or efficacious value. If you add to this, unrealistic expectations and the tendency to ‘hear’ something the way you want to hear something, you have quite a complex situation.

In today’s reading from Jeremiah (JER 18: 18-20), we hear the reluctant prophet, subject to the plotting of those whom he is addressing, who is wondering how doing the Lord’s bidding is resulting in this conspiracy of the people of Judah against him:

‘The people of Judah and the citizens of Jerusalem said, “Come, let us contrive a plot against Jeremiah… let us destroy him by his own tongue; let us carefully note his every word.” Heed me, O LORD, and listen to what my adversaries say. Must good be repaid with evil that they should dig a pit to take my life? Remember that I stood before you to speak in their behalf, to turn away your wrath from them.” ‘

Jeremiah is quite baffled and indeed angry that the very ones whom he tried to save from God’s wrath have turned on him and are now seeking his demise. Jeremiah is also perplexed that after doing the Lord’s bidding, the Lord does not seem to be protecting him from the contemptuous behavior of these conspirators. This seems quite unfair.

Some of us can relate to both sides of this situation – Jeremiah and Judah. Some of us have probably been in a position of feeling put upon to do something that we did not want to do in the first place, only then to have those who stood to benefit from what we were doing actually resent us for it. On the other hand, we also have more than likely found ourselves quite put off’ by someone pointing out our failures or shortcomings.  I know I have been guilty of these.

So what does this mean? Well, it could mean that rigid expectations in our lives are preventing us from listening to what is being told to us. We may not like what we hear because it could actually mean that we should do something about it – look hard at ourselves and our attitudes, or maybe just allow ourselves to be questioned at all.  In a certain sense, we could even say that Jeremiah’s complaint to God about having to do a thankless job is not that far off from the people of Judah’s resentful and ultimately vengeful response to being confronted. Both Jeremiah and Judah do not want to hear what is being asked of them.

There is also the temptation toward the easy and pleasurable path, rather than one that may be difficult, yet in the end, life-giving. In the West, we capitalize on this quite literally. Our economy is based upon it and for that reason we suffer from constant bolstering of expectations that honestly can never be fulfilled. It is not that pleasure is bad, but the pursuit of it can be harmfully unrealistic, when it is sought after as a value in itself. Jesus, clearly tells his disciples in today’s Gospel (MT 20: 17-28) the path that his life would take:

“…the Son of Man will be handed over…and they will condemn him to death, and hand him over…to be mocked and scourged and crucified, and he will be raised on the third day.”

There is nothing easy or desirous in this description for sure. Jesus is not telling them that he is seeking this to happen or that he is particularly happy about THAT it will happen. He is simply saying that it will happen. Are they listening to him? The very next passage clearly shows how deaf they have been:

’Then the mother of the sons of Zebedee approached Jesus with her sons… wishing to ask him for something… “Command that these two sons of mine sit, one at your right and the other at your left, in your kingdom.” Jesus said in reply, “You do not know what you are asking. Can you drink the chalice that I am going to drink?” They said to him, “We can.” He replied, “My chalice you will indeed drink, but to sit at my right and at my left, this is not mine to give.”

Jesus, in an attempt to assuage the indignation of the other disciples, who are appalled by this brazen request by James and John’s mother, tells them once more what it means to be a follower of Him:

“…whoever wishes to be great among you shall be your servant; whoever wishes to be first among you shall be your slave. Just so, the Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

We, like Jeremiah and the disciples, mistakenly think that following Christ or God provides reward and privilege. But reward and privilege always means that someone loses or that someone is left out. Like the disciples, we disregard the description of the Christ Life (suffering, death and resurrection), and seek the ‘high life,’ set apart from the others. And when happiness (or a specific answer to a prayer) does not come, we become resentful and blame God (or the messenger) for not providing this, just like the reactions of Jeremiah and Judah.

The source of this mistake seems to be our inability to listen to Christ calling us to follow and not lead, to serve and not reign. This is the ‘chalice’ we are asked to drink and share. This chalice of wisdom favors self-less love over pleasure and successful gain. Life happens and it includes joy and pain, most of which we cannot control. When we can listen with our heart, we will be able to hear God in us, through us, and in each other, and this will lead us through it all, transforming expectations of happiness, health, and prosperity into the only real expectation that can be fulfilled – Love, WHO is God! God’s undying love will save us, as the ‘ransom for many.’

Our responsibility as followers is to relativize the expectations of outcomes in our lives that breed resentment and ‘unfairness,’ and authentically share the chalice of compassion, mercy and justice by listening and acting with our Hearts. This is Wisdom of the Chalice!

Peace

Thomas

The soul is the delicate yet durable cloth  woven and laced together in loving pattern  by the merciful strokes of God’s Passings…
And the sheen of our soul is the ever-glowing  awareness we have of this sacred-stitched fabric.

(Originally published March 15, 2017)